Looking back, I believe organized sports and I officially became enemies in second grade. Taking a soccer ball to the back of the head during our opening game was a clear indicator that the relationship wasn’t going to work.
And things haven’t changed much in the years since, so I have slowly gravitated to what I like to call “alternative sports.” In a stroke of good luck, Colorado State University and Fort Collins are filled with choices for those of us who would rather lie down and die than catch a football.
The cheapest and most convenient sports are offered through the Student Recreation Department’s intramural program. Joshua Norris, the sports coordinator for the program, estimates that between 8,000 and 9,000 students participate annually. Soccer, both indoor and regular, flag football, slow-pitch softball and basketball are offered, but there are so many more!
if you can dodge a wrench …
Of all of sports offered by Campus Recreation, dodgeball is the most popular. The coed league begins in late October, and same-sex league in the spring.
For those who are not athletically inclined, dodgeball offers you the chance to hone your real-life Super Mario Brothers skills. The best part: it’s fairly difficult to get hurt playing, which is a serious plus for me. According to Norris, the movie “Dodgeball” has increased the popularity of the sport, and has inspired many college and city recreation leagues to offer it.
float on
The second most popular sport offered at CSU is inner tube water polo. Offered during the same seasons as dodgeball, inner tube water polo has loyal participants, such as Katie Salankey, a senior health and exercise science major, has played for three seasons and plans to participate in both seasons this year, too.
“Honestly, the whole game was my best experience,” Salankey said. “It is such a unique game and I’ve enjoyed every minute of it. [It’s] definitely worth the time to play. Where else are you ever going to be able to play inner tube water polo?”
And some teams in this sport even have loyal followers.
“It starts to look like you’re watching a heavy weight fight,” Norris said. “Parents drive an hour to watch their kids play inner tube water polo. “
Entry fees for the league sports are never more than $45 per team, which is pretty darn cheap when you consider how many hours of entertainment that buys you.
time for a showdown
Aside from the league sports offered, varying tournaments are scheduled for all sorts of interests. From Wii bowling to paintball to golf and Ultimate Frisbee, students should have no trouble finding a way to get involved.
“They are designed for fun and designed so students will meet other students,” Norris said. “You have to get out there and meet people. [It’s] more about having fun, less about winning.”
Agreed. When it comes down to it, it is all about friends and fun, and laughing at yourself.
represent your city
If you thought dodgeball and inner tube water polo sound unique, you need to see what the city has to offer. FoCo’ers can learn to clog. Or belly dance. Or play underwater hockey. In my head, I keep trying to picture this one, and I am taken back to the traumatic “dive for the penny” years of childhood swimming lessons. But it certainly has potential.
The city also has an on-going badminton league, which the description says is for “Active Older Adults” but is technically 18 and up. Don’t let the age difference discourage you though. Some of the coolest people I know don’t even have to show I.D!
Other offerings include arts and craft classes, including Intro to Clawhammer Banjo (you know you want to. . .), as well as archery, no-contact boxing, and all those other boring activities like volley ball, soccer, flag football . . . blah blah blah.
eastern awesomeness
Not everyone enjoys the silly antics that are found in intramural sports. For those seeking a more meaningful experience, Fort Collins boasts an impressive number of martial arts studios. Offering one of the more eclectic rosters of marital art forms is Meridian Gate Kung Fu Center, owned by Kurt Yungeberg.
His center offers three types of kung fu: Tai Chi, Tan Tui, and Hou Quan, which charmingly translates into “Monkey Boxing.” In addition to Kung Fu, students can also take traditional staff fighting or learn how to use the Chinese straight sword. Imagine: real sword fights in Fort Collins! OK, maybe not, but it is fun to imagine Yungeberg will not promote students to using real weapons until they are ready, and as the sport has only been offered since the late fall of 2008, no one is wielding cold steel just yet.
go large or go home
Currently my personal maxim is “You only get one life.” All right, fine, I actually stole that from my roommate, but unless you are an Ironman or something, the same is true for each one of you. Whether you learn to play banjo or drown playing underwater hockey (that just seems too weird for words) getting involved and laughing at yourself is something you will ever regret. Good memories stick with you for a longtime and can always be returned to in times of pain, sadness or abject boredom. So make the most of your life and maybe even earn a killer nickname in the process. Sorry, but Super Mario is already taken.
holly blair hoskins is a stealth megalomaniac who enjoys long snorkels in the lagoon and loitering in the college of business computer lab. e-mail your comments, criticisms and fan mail to csumag@lamar.colostate.edu.
Tags: Volume 5 Issue 1
